This article is actually just a side tangent extension of our previous "dandelion theory" (which has several ongoing parts [1, 2, 3]), which by the way is working out quite well this summer, so far. For we just let them brilliant colored fast growing pesky little yellow things grow to their hearts content, and whenever we get around to it...oh, in 3 to 4 weeks time, then we mow 'em down.
But we have noticed that there is one little minor hole in our newfound noble theory. The wild grasses and all the various accompanied weeds quickly reach ginormous proportion...12-15-inches tall (and taller!) in our front lawn. One section (that rarely gets mowed) had completely gotten away from, and put on a mega spurt of growth, reaching over two feet tall...man that was a bear mowing that section.
All this madness of endless lawn mowing care has a source of course...it's all caused by the endless drenching down pouring drizzling rainy damp cloudy near constantly dumps for six month straight in this broad valley west of the great Cascadia mountains, for all of those rain showers get dumped right here on this side of Cascadia resulting in an astounding degrees of luxuriant green growth (don't get me started on the bugs).
For I perceive that my general theory of inter-relativity to dandelions needs a little adjusting, for if we let the dandelions do their thing for 3+ weeks -- then the weeds and grasses all quickly joined in on the fun party, and sooner or later it all got way out of control).
So we've opted for a slight change in our great and mystical new grand dandelion theory. We'll still go right ahead and let those pesky bright yellow colored dandelions do their own special thing (as they always have) by ultra growing fast in our front yard lawn, and we'll mow it just before it gets TOO tall...virtually exactly as planned.
But we've changed our tactics for the backyard lawn (for that is the fenced in part). Our new choice of action?
We have bought a goat...yep, a billy goat (later we'll try the nanny goat theory). Initially we had thought of a female goat and knew just how useful and beneficial all of that free delicious tasting goat milk, goat yogurt, goat cheese would be. Yet it also seemed like it was gonna be more work than our general dandelion theory could bear dealing with at the moment. And that's where mister billy goat came in.
Our new four-footed hairy (and friendly) goat is presently on a very long leash in the backyard roaming in great big circles nibbling down to a short stub all of the excess weeds and grasses and dandelions. At the success rate that he is working on that project, our backyard lawn may never need mowing again.
As an interesting side thought...
Our new "goat theory" might even be a useful venture for all those lawn mowing addicts in the forlorn state of California who can now only use "electric" lawn mowers (for apparently gas lawn mowers are banned from future sales).
Instead of you always using a very very ------------- very long extension cord for that electric mower just to trim the furthest most reaches of your big backyard...why not consider our quantized "goat theory"?
Use the short electric cord on your electric lawn mower for the front lawn only. Then, purchase a friendly goat and use that likable hairy four-footed creature for your large backyard! Problem solved...no more work for you, because the nibbling creature takes care of it all for ya.
And if you bought a female goat, you could market the excess goat milk, goat cheese, goat yogurt, and make some $$ on the side.
We can just see it now...quite out of the blue...one day without muchado...something fell from the sky...all of the citizens in that economically struggling state of California abruptly discarded their much disliked electric mowers and every single home property owner (is that about 14 million?) will now have their own four-footed hairy automatic lawn mower takin' care of business.
Picture that...a state utterly void of electric lawn mowers -- instead it's plug full of likable hairy four-footed goats "takin' care of business every day, takin' care of business every way."
...that's just a little BTO ditty tune to help spur ya along.
And there'd be a well saturated retail market out there too...where every store shelf would be super stocked with endless supplies of ultra cheap, excellent quality, very healthy, goat milk, goat cheese, and goat yogurt.
And we noticed that one neighbor who lives not too far away from here has already beat us to this concept of "goat theory", and they've fenced in several goats around their property (so the critters can take care of the natural lawn care business).
Sometimes I feel like a genius,
Sometimes I don't,
Almond Joy's got nuts,
Mounds don't....
